Little Miss Christmas is a seasonal gem worth unwrapping
Sleigh, queen! Little Miss Christmas has officially jingled its way into London, and what a fabulously festive treat it is. Making its London debut at Southwark Playhouse Borough, this gloriously camp and chaotic drag-cabaret pageant offers a welcome antidote to the slick, over-commercialised Christmas season, writes Luigia Minichiello.
We are greeted by the Queen of Christmas herself: Patti Boo Rae, who proudly puts the Chris in Christmas and the c**t in country. Playing a heightened version of herself, Patti is the reigning Little Miss Christmas and self-declared shoo-in for the Candy Cane Crown. Certain she’ll breeze through the competition unchallenged, watching that confidence wobble and slowly unravel, is one of the show’s great pleasures.
Patti’s performance is a whirlwind of live vocals, silly skits, lightning-fast costume changes and even a moment of “synchronised swimming” to Blue Christmas! I won’t spoil how that works on stage. She has a strong voice and undeniable stage presence, particularly when she cheekily rewrites the lyrics to Santa Baby. That only makes the opening lip-sync feel like a slightly underwhelming way to introduce the show, especially given her vocal ability.
Structured like a traditional beauty pageant, Interview, Swimsuit, Evening Wear, Talent and Coronation—the format is instantly familiar and ripe for parody. Audience participation is used to great effect, particularly during the interview round. Asked what gift she’d most like to receive, Patti replies: “All the traditional ones, gold, frankincense and myrrh.” She also names the baby Jesus as her role model, citing his perfect skin and his uncanny ability to always be the centre of attention.
The show gleefully borrows from RuPaul’s Drag Race, Mean Girls and full-blown panto, creating a glittering mash-up that feels comfortingly Christmassy. A genuinely inspired idea is the rotating guest performer, who appears each night as Patti’s rival, drawn from London’s drag, cabaret, comedy or panto scene meaning no two performances are the same. It’s a shame, though, that the competitor isn’t given more opportunity to really showcase their talents or turn the evening into a proper showdown.
Some of the pre-recorded video skits used to allow for costume changes run a little long and occasionally lose momentum. Still, writer Coggin Galbreath’s witty script gently probes our obsession with perfection and performance. Given its London run, a few more local or Southwark-specific references would have added an extra layer of fun.
Patti Boo Rae’s tongue-in-cheek determination to reclaim her crown (“Mama didn’t raise no quitter!”) fuels the show, with plenty of laughs along the way—especially her claim to have been good for Santa “all year… all the cowboys I didn’t ride.” The final showdown drags an audience member onstage for a performance to You Can Leave Your Hat On, culminating in Patti confidently strutting in a pair of Daisy Dukes. Funny, unabashedly camp and festive to its core, Little Miss Christmas is a seasonal gem worth unwrapping.
Southwark Playhouse Borough until January 3rd.
Booking and full details: https://southwarkplayhouse.co.uk/productions/little-miss-christmas/
