Exploring themes of loneliness, desire and vulnerability
After two completely sold-out seasons in 2023 and 2024, this compelling and provocative play by Tony Award-winning playwright Joe DiPietro remains as relevant as ever, offering audiences a raw, intimate, and humorous look at the complexities of modern gay relationships, writes Luigia Minichiello.
A contemporary reimagining of Schnitzler’s La Ronde, F**king Men follows ten men through a series of interwoven, erotic, and emotionally charged encounters that reveal their struggles with love, sex, identity, and connection. DiPietro’s script balances sharp wit with poignant insight, exploring the tension between monogamy and sexual freedom in today’s world.
At its core, this play is about connection. It opens with a glimpse into the lives of the characters who will intertwine throughout the 90-minute show. The first scene presents an army recruit experiencing his first sexual encounter with a man, driven by the uncertainty of his future. His internal struggle with desire and societal expectations leads to an explosive moment of violence, which ultimately gives way to an apology and the realization that casual sex with men doesn’t require the same emotional investment as dating women.
The play seamlessly shifts between various familiar male archetypes, all played with skill and nuance: the selfish student, the bumbling professor, the older man seeking companionship, the closeted journalist, the actor hesitant to come out, the confident porn star, and the struggling playwright. Each character grapples with the expectations of gay culture—should they embrace promiscuity or seek monogamous love? Is sleeping around a requirement for a gay man, or is it possible to find stability? Ultimately, all of them seek deeper connection and love.
The play offers a cheeky nod to the ongoing pronoun debate when the writer character fumbles over how to introduce himself—queen, cis boy, gay—before settling on the safest option: “cocksucker.” Meanwhile, older characters try to impart wisdom to their younger counterparts, stressing that true intimacy goes beyond bed-hopping. Yet, younger characters see long-term relationships as dull—suggesting that sex toys might help, only to dismiss the idea as something “straight couples do.”
A particularly striking scene features an actor on the verge of coming out before a major film release, facing pressure from a closeted reporter to stay silent. This moment underscores the persistent struggles of LGBTQ+ figures in the public eye.
Waterloo East Theatre’s intimate setting amplifies the play’s impact, with minimal yet effective staging highlighting strong performances and sharp dialogue.
Though the American accents weren’t always convincing, the play’s themes remain universal. While humorous and playful at times, the play does not shy away from exploring themes of loneliness, desire, and vulnerability. Whether exploring fleeting encounters or long-term commitments, F**king Men is ultimately about the desire to connect and find opportunities for love in life.
Waterloo East Theatre, Brad Street London SE1 8TN until 4th May. Times: Tues – Fri 7.30pm; Sat – 4pm & 7.30pm; Sun – 2pm & 6pm (No 6pm performance Sun March 23). Admission: £28 – £42.
Booking and full details: www.waterlooeast.co.uk
